Whilst searching for information about the new 15 certificate version of Bruno, I stumbled across the pbbfc.co.uk. No, not the BBFC, but the PBBFC. Funded by the BBFC, the website aims to inform parents about what happens in films such as Harry Potter, Transformers and other films that are out at the cinema and on DVD.
The idea is you bung your chosen film in, click and HUZZAH! You’re faced with a brief synopsis and a rundown of certain scenes that contain sex, violence or swearing. Having looked up the Jonas Brothers 3D Experience, I’m now safe in the knowledge that whilst we see a young girl hyperventilating at the very thought of seeing the mop topped village of the damned; she’s ultimately shown to be okay. Phew! I’m also reliably informed that the violence in Transformers is strong but involves robots. So that’s alright. It’s like having a teacher attentively try and explain what the film Deep Throat is about.
I could quite easily mock this site, but I think it’s a fantastic idea. I, for one, am tired of going to 12a certificate movies that come with a commentary of children crying at the sight of Megan Fox’s cleavage. Though to be fair, I appreciate the problems parents have. Since its conception, the 12a certificate has always been coloured battleship grey. Just because the film in question is aimed at kids, doesn’t mean there won’t be a chance of someone saying ‘fuck’. Look at Hancock. So, in light of this, it’s no surprise that website has arisen and started the work of scraping the scales from our eyes.
The only thing that does disappoint me is that the site feels the need to explain how 18 certificates work on games. Does this really need to be explained? What makes mum and dad think that the certificates are any different from those of the big screen?
Are there really parents out there right now in HMV clutching a copy a Dead Space pondering, ‘Little Suzie loved Peggle… And this says it’s got puzzle elements to it… I wonder’.
Well, in case there is… Slow down turtle neck. To save you the money you will inevitably have to spend on therapists to get Suzie to sleep and eat solids again, listen up to my handy hints on spotting a game that is not suitable for the younger child. For today’s lecture, I shall be using the aforementioned Dead Space.
Definately NOT Peggle...
1) It has the word ‘dead’ in the title. A word often not associated with Barbie, the Wiggles, Lazy Town and other joyful things that make Suzie’s life so innocent and pure. So… Think on.
2) A severed arm floating in space is the motif of the box art. Taking this on board it’s a good chance that Sportacus will not be making an appearance any time soon. Yes, you’ve explained to Suzie what happened to that woman’s arm on Cbeebies, but this really isn’t the same thing.
3) Move your eyes to the left hand corner at the bottom. See a white box? Does it have an 18 in it? This is an 18 certificate. Not sure? Go to Blockbuster and rent out Deliverance, Pulp Fiction and Hostel. Watch them back to back. See what an 18 is now? You’re a step away from buying Little Suzie £20 worth of drugs, hillbilly sodomy and slashes to the back of the ankle!
You’ve picked up a game unsuitable for children. Put it down and move away from the shelf. PHEW! That was close!
The PBBFC is great idea but it troubles me that we still have to explain 18 certificates to those over the age of 18.
Where’s Simon Bates when you need him?
